Hard landing and settling in

Honest review of the property market in Paris

This is the 2.5^th week that I am in Paris. My brain is tired from socializing in my native language, thinking in my second language and studying in my third language. Fortunately, I have found a place that is less than a mile away from Eiffel Tower. I walk across the street and found, to my surprise, the iron structure in plein air dazzling in front of me.

I have created a thing called Dossier Facile three months ago, with all my valuable personal data such as how much rent I had paid in the past, my pay slips and tax accounts, to prove to a prospective French landlord my creditworthiness. I also set up my commercial guarantor profile, called GarantMe, as an alternative for those without a physical guarantor. While I was in Singapore, I managed to get a French phone number, just so that property agents can call me at 3am Singapore time to ask me to come down for a viewing. Of course I couldn’t. Even with me surrendering all my personal information and spamming 10 or something housing requests per day across 5+ different platforms, I struggled to find a flat that is inhabitable. This is very much like the dating market. Either you don’t like the flat, or the owner prefers another candidate with a more stable job, or the timing doesn’t quite work out. Rejections are common. Anxiety is persistent. I also briefly contemplated buying a tent.

[my cat being a good sport in the midst of this frantic house search]

The most bizarre house called me down for a visit on a Sunday afternoon. I rushed back from a siesta party in Esbly (thankfully only 30 minutes by train), cycled from the north to the deep south. I was this close to taking this flat, even though there is no proper bedroom, even though I really don’t need a bunk bed, even though it is a dimly-lit rez-de-chaussée (the ground floor). The agent also showed me an underground cellar lined with gravel, big enough to hold a BBQ party for one with proper grills. But given how bizarre the layout was, I talked myself out of signing a lease.

[the very first house I viewed which has no washing machine, also groundfloor]

At the pinnacle of my housing crisis, I received an e-mail from a lady who claimed to be a “gestionnaire” (administrator) who is overseas receiving medical treatment. She said she was happy to sign a long-term lease once she is back in France, but for now I could pay her one month’s rent + deposit, to reserve this beautiful apartment in the 3^eme arrondisement, next to some of my favourite Lebanese restaurants. We exchanged 3 or 4 e-mails. The apartment looked almost too spacious to be true at 50 sqm.

[the scam]

Once a friend pointed out how the photos looked like they were AI-generated, I became more suspicious. Katerina sent me the booking.com link, which showed glowing reviews of her as “the best landlord you could ever find in Paris”. While the website was entirely in French, the glowing reviews were in English – despite the reviewers being obviously francophone. And I could not open any of the reviews. The website domain is not booking.com. It also led me to payment instructions to transfer to an Italian bank account by the name of Francesca. Katerina Duterte didn’t sound like an Italian name. Finally, upon the culmination of all the red flags, I searched and could not find this Duterte person on LinkedIn. There is no trace of her elsewhere on the Internet. Then I learnt from my almost-landlord friend, whom I found on Xiaohongshu, that this is a very typical scam in the rental market.

I was too busy if not I would have sent her follow-up e-mails to scam the scammer.

[this was en route to my 4th visit, the landlord preferred another tenant and sent me a long rejection message]

After 10-12 house visits over a week (not including the scam), during some of which I was this close to begging the landlord to take me in, I found this apartment with everything I don’t need while missing everything I do need. There is no microwave. There are 20 something knives but there is no chopping board. There is a vase but it is leaking. The agent took 2 hours to “validate” the house before I moved in, accounting for every fork and knife. I still don’t have a table thanks to UPS. But now I have a “bail” that is subject to proper encadrement de loyer – i.e. rent control and other tenant-friendly laws – which means that the landlord can’t kick me out unless I have breached the fundamental terms of the contract. Such as burning it down.

[I found a bike on Gens de Confiance from this workshop in the 14th, the bike has been absolutely indispensable]

After finding this apartment, I finally understood the rules of the game. You need to be one of the first to send a request on the platform. In this case I used Se Loger. Once the listing opens up, the agent might receive 20 something requests within 10 minutes. After that 10-minute window, the agent is likely going to ignore the rest. Then comes the rendez-vous. I was the first person to view the flat that day. I arrived on time, dressed up slightly, and marveled at how beautiful the apartment is (it is okay), and how quiet the neighbourhood is. Anyways, anything to get the agent to like you. Then I confirmed my application on the spot, sur place, and submitted my full dossier 15 minutes after the visit. The landlord approved my profile, and the agent cancelled the rest of the rendez-vous scheduled the following day.

I came to appreciate how hard it is for a foreign student without a physical guarantor to rent. There is indeed a thriving alternative market on Xiaohongshu operating on trust and capital (more the latter), and not based on whether you are on a CDI (indeterminate long-term employment contract) or a CDD (determinate fixed-term contract).

[in between my house visits people were dancing]

At last I have a roof over my head and more space than I could ever ask for. Which then gives me the breathing room to question again why I am here. Does the pollen-stricken air taste fresher. Is it worth the sacrifice of leaving my home and friends. Is my struggle with accountancy and French constitutionalism in a foreign language worth the while. What is liberté, egalité, fraternité when there are so many sans-abri homeless people.

My classmates are mostly fresh out of college. Most find it bizarre that I voluntarily subject myself to this cruel and inhumane treatment despite being a qualified lawyer. But so far it has been quite an adventure, and after averting a housing crisis, I could finally sit down (on the floor of course, I haven’t bought an armchair) and drink to my health.

[We still don’t have a table but pepe has got a hot shower]